Wednesday, April 11, 2007

Sleep Update

Thanks to all of you who posted your encouraging words yesterday. It was one bad day but today's already looking a little better.

Despite my best efforts to keep Micah awake yesterday, this was the scene on the way home from Superstore...

He was so tired that he let me transfer him to his bed (which is unusual). I then quickly made supper - half of me thankful to have the peace and quiet and half of me worrying that I was messing up our chances of an easy bedtime. I let him sleep about half an hour and then woke him up. Thankfully he was still tired enough that he didn't put up much of a fight at bedtime. I'm sure the tylenol we gave him for his cold helped :) He slept 10 hours straight without a peep. Now I just put him down for his nap and he went down very easily. I sang him a song and told him I needed to check on Keziah and that I'd be right back. By the time I came back he was out like a light. So, that's a relief!

Keziah was up a lot last night, but more fussing/talking than crying so I just gave her the soother and let her fuss a bit. I was able to stretch her to 6 hours before feeding her. So, even though I was up with her a lot, it still felt like progress to not be feeding her every 3-4 hours.

After supper last night I headed to the library to check out a couple of parenting books specific to sleeping. I know I run the risk of information-overload and the frustration of sorting through different techniques, but there's a lot of hope that comes from reading other families' success stories and knowing that I can modify anything I read to suit our specific needs.

I came across a book called "Good Night, Sleep Tight" which immediately caught my attention :) From reading it so far it looks like it falls somewhere in between responding to all your babies cries and being very involved in their sleep-training (i.e. the Baby Whisperer) and letting your baby cry it out (i.e. Baby Wise). I do believe crying it out works and this author admits it too, but she knows that many parents can't handle that method and I admit I'm kind of drawn to this "gentler" approach. When I looked up Keziah's age range, the author mentioned that it was actually an ideal time to implement sleep-training because babies that age understand object permanence (just because I can't see Mommy doesn't mean she's not there) and they're also young enough that none of the bad habits are "un-breakable". The book also gave me added assurance that a 4-month-old of a healthy weight should ideally be sleeping 8 hour stretches without eating.

Basically the author says that there will be some crying, but you remain close to your child and try to soothe with your voice, touch, etc. She says soothers are OK, but not if they've become a sleep crutch. Um... too late. So, today when Keziah woke up in the middle of her nap I tried shushing and patting and soothing... I probably should've waited it out a bit longer for her to try to settle herself (up to 20 minutes according to the book), but it was so easy just to plug that soother back in since I knew it would do the trick. I'm sure if we could break the soother habit already she would start sleeping a lot better. An overwhelming thought but I am tempted to push through a few days of crying to see if it might work (easy to say right now when it's not 3 am and I'm not exhausted!!)

So, that's the update. Now I need to tackle some housework before everyone wakes up...

12 comments:

Summer said...

Hi Jamie, I did a little research on sleeping and I found this:
At this age, you will probably want your baby to start falling asleep on his or her own. This may mean performing your nighttime routine and putting the baby into the crib while he or she is still awake. If the baby cries, stay away for a few minutes. Your baby may settle down and go to sleep. If the crying continues, go back in and soothe the baby for a moment, without picking him or her up. This may go on a few times until your baby figures out that the crying is not getting anywhere. Expect that this may be a difficult exercise for you, simply because it's distressing to hear your baby cry. Try to remember that if you know your baby is safe, a little crying now so that you can all sleep better later is ultimately the healthier choice.

Hope this little advice helps you.

Anonymous said...

*sigh* This sounds tough to me! I wonder if James would really be able to handle that??? I don't think I have the guts to try it. I keep saying that at 6 months I will officially try getting him to sleep 8 hours. Help!

Bonnie said...

Glad to hear it was a better day for you Jamie! Its always neat to read about your "trials & tribulations" and see how things work out :) Sounds to me like you're doing great!!

Drea said...

Interesting post about the book. Maybe I should let Taite fuss more in the mornings. He gets up around 4:30-5:30am now. But he isnt crying. He just fusses a little bit. I give him a small 4 oz bottle and hes back down until 8am.
I think though he could go without it... because some nights he only drinks 2 oz!
Maybe ill try this...

I dont think soothers are bad though. I love the wubbanub I own.. Taite finds it really easy already and he isnt even 4 months.

Kimberly said...

That sounds really reasonable. I know it's super hard at first, but it's worked for us, twice! We LOVE Marc Wiessbluth's book (Healthy sleep habits, happy child, esp. the latest edition) so much I think we should get a commission! (we don't!) He says a lot of the same things but really lays out the different methods and their pros/cons. AND he talks about all ages. Anyways, I hope it goes well. The crying does get better, very quickly and it developes lung capacity. Someday your kids will sing in a choir and they'll thank you for letting them cry! (okay, maybe not, but it's a nice thought when you're watching the clock waiting for them to fall asleep!)

Anonymous said...

you should read The No-Cry Sleep Solution.

Amber said...

If only sleep wasn't so important! It would be nice if it were "optional" and we'd still function the same ;)

Trev and Rebekah said...

Your an ambitious mother! :0) I was thinking about writing a post wondering if people out there thought it was a good idea to read a bunch of books before the baby came or to just look for the books when the time comes that you need them. So would you take her soother away just for bed time or all together? Would you recommend not implementing one at all? How is Micah doing with that?

Anonymous said...

I have absolutely no cred writing anything, b/c I've never fully tried any sleeping techniques with Sadie, and she still wakes up a couple times a night, but I found that reading the baby whisperer stressed me out and reinforced beliefs that every kid has to be a perfect sleeper or else you're a less than adequate mother. After reading through the No Cry Sleep Solution, my anxiety decreased from hearing that sometimes babies just wake up naturally b/c they really are hungry, or growing, or teething etc. For me, I found it more manageable to be up twice at night, than worrying all day about naps and sleep training, esp. considering that Sadie seemed very happy throughout the day. However, I might feel differently if I had two little cuties waking up at night :) (and I do remember about a month of 4-5 wakings a night - not fun)
Good luck! Erin g.

Sarah said...

Ah, sleep joys! Isn't it amazing how your world can be colored when you are lacking sleep?? I am feeling it today (for other reasons), but fully get how it affects your day! Hang in there Jamie. I'm sure you will glean good info from your book reading, posting, and friends. Take what you can live with and scrap the rest. All the best with it. Oh, by the way, I love that pic of Keziah sleeping in her seat. She looks SO BIG. Rosanna was talking to Elijah yesterday about her cute niece...

Erica H said...

Lately I've been trying to get Annika to fall asleep on her own, by laying her in her crib awake. She is so used to me rocking her to sleep, and I don't want to do that for much longer (it gets exhausting and time consuming). Its been really tough on me to hear her cry forever (it seems)! I started laying her down for her morning nap so at least while she's screaming I can hop in the shower, blow dry my hair, etc and I've found I'm less likely then to pick her up while I'm getting myself ready for the day, and 20 mins of crying have passed during that time, and she's ussually nodded off by the time I'm done...but at night when I'm just upstairs sitting on the couch practically in tears...I have a REEEAAALLY hard time not going down there to pick her up and just rock her. Motherhood...why does it have to be so complicating!? Annika is also addicted to her soother!

The Keowns said...

i am glad those sleepless days are long done. It does get better. Often you need to use your own instincts though rather then a method from a book. Since every baby is different I don't believe there is one solution that will fix it all.
as for the soother, let her use it all the time since she is still so young. I remember Dr. Phil once saying that should get rid of it before a year. Well, It think that is balony!! Cassidy had no problem ditching hers and it helped her become a wonderful sleeper.
I too this day feel it is best to let them cry it out. They are smarter then we think. Liam right from the beginning was placed in his crib to fuss, and now he sleeps like a dream.
It will get better. As for the Micah napping thing, it was shortly after Cassidys 2nd birthday that she gave up her nap.