Grief is affecting all of us... Micah included. We have gone through some serious regression in several areas; namely potty training, sleeping & separation anxiety.
Poor sleeping and "clingy-ness" have always been issues with Micah, but the potty-training had been SO easy! I never put a pull-up on him for naps and he was even dry most nights. He always told me when he had to pee and accidents were very rare. Now I feel like we're starting at square one and the progress just isn't happening as quickly. It's been hard not to be frustrated since I know that he knows better. But, we are back to using stickers and chocolate chips and throwing little parties when he can pee in the potty and not in his underwear. And if I forget to remind him he will usually just pee his pants. Today we went to playgroup and when I buckled him into the car he was soaking wet. I don't think he even cared. I know that potty-training can be an ongoing process like this for lots of kids. But when he was doing perfectly for so many weeks already it's very hard to go back to this.
And I have never seen Micah as clingy to me as he has been this last month. Even Grandma, who in the past has sometimes been more desirable company than even Mom or Dad, just doesn't seem to cut it for him lately. This is hard, because he is not as willing to go upstairs and play with her for an hour here or there. In a public setting (i.e. playgroup today) he will not let me out of his sight and practically hangs on me the whole time. I don't know what I can do to regain his trust. I guess time will be the biggest factor - just reassuring him over and over that I am here and if I do leave that I will come back. It saddens me to see him so afraid and so upset. I've resolved to always tell him if I do go somewhere because I don't think sneaking around will get us anywhere in terms of gaining trust. But, I would LOVE to take people up on the many babysitting offers I've received, but right now it's just not worth it. I hope that we can make a turn-around in this area soon...
And sleeping - well, sleeping has always been a challenge with Micah. It hasn't worsened too much in the last month other than that we just let him stay up late every night since it wasn't worth it to fight with him when there was so much other stuff going on. So, now we are trying to re-introduce a bedtime that is earlier than 9 pm and that hasn't been easy.
Anyway, reading Andrea's blog today reminded me today that God really does care about these "Mommy" worries and I don't know why I forget that. So, I need to pray about these things and not let them stress me out!