Catching Up

It's getting hard for me to keep up with the blog these days. I've got pictures piling up and no time to post them! So, here is my attempt to catch up a little bit...

Silas is over 2 weeks old now and I think we're adjusting quite well. I'm really enjoying most aspects of the baby phase - it's fun to have a newborn around again - but the hard part is the time it takes away from Micah and Keziah. I go through my days struggling with the inevitable "mommy guilt" - Am I giving them enough focused attention? Am I letting them get away with too much? Am I being too hard on them? Are they getting enough stimulation?


Keziah is definitely giving new meaning to the terrible twos - she can be extremely stubborn and particular about things. She's been spending quite a bit of time on the "naughty step" these days... And Micah is definitely needing more stimulation throughout the day. I think if preschool started right now he would be ready for it, but now we'll have to wait until September. I hear the words "I'm bored" several times throughout the day.


Micah has been a little rough with Silas a couple of times - I think as a way to get our attention. One day he decided to just pick him up all on his own. Good thing we were close by and stopped him before he got too far! And the other day Silas was in the baby swing and Micah decided to give him a BIG push. Silas toppled forward onto the floor but was surprisingly unharmed. The swing is very low to the ground and it was partly my fault for not buckling him in (though I don't think the buckle would've stopped him from toppling considering the angle Micah pushed him at!) Erik sent Micah to a time-out and disciplined him quite harshly. When his time-out was over and Erik went to talk to him about what happened, Micah started bawling. I think it finally sunk in that he could've really hurt Silas. It's probably good that he felt so guilty, but it was also heartbreaking to see him feeling so bad!


Keziah would probably smother Silas if I let her. Sometimes when I'm trying to feed him she's practically crawling on top of both of us so she can shower him with kisses. Everything he does elicits the same response from her: "He's so tute!"


The nights have been going alright so far. Silas is usually up twice to eat but generally sleeps straight through between feedings so I can't really complain. He had one night of waking only once and I keep hoping he will do it again but so far there have been no repeat performances :) The last few nights he's woken up at 2 am like clockwork (after sleeping a 4 hour stretch) but then wants to get up every 2 hours after that. I find sometimes that I start feeding him before my foggy brain can even compute how much time has elapsed from the last feed. So last night when he got up again after a 2 hour stretch I walked with him and sat in the rocker until he fell back to sleep. Hopefully we can get him out of that habit, though giving him a quick feed is awfully tempting so I can get straight back to sleep!

I am certain that Silas smiled at me the other day. I know it would be really early for him to do this at just 2 weeks, but Erik even thought he saw him smile. He gave us a few "smiling" looks" over the weekend, but no matter how much we coo over him now, we haven't seen that look for a few days...


I've been reflecting on how my parenting style has evolved from 1st baby to 3rd. With Micah I had absolutely no schedule. I fed him when he cried and had no game plan to get him to sleep through the night. With Keziah, I implemented more schedule and tried some different things before finding what worked for us. This time around I feel like I've finally figured it out. I kind of feel like Micah and Keziah were my practice babies, and this time I get to do it the "right" way from the start - ha ha.

Anyway, onto the Easter festivities... It was neat for us to talk with Micah about the Easter story this year and watch him start to grasp some of the concepts. I think his awareness of death and life relates a lot to his Uncle Nathan so when we explain that Jesus died but didn't stay dead, he seems to understand how extraordinary that is.


Easter didn't go by without a few treats, either. I made a little Easter egg hunt for the kids in the house. They loved it and we've had fun playing Easter egg hunt every day since! Thankfully the kids don't mind that the eggs no longer have candy in them - I guess they still like the thrill of the hunt! They also got to colour and decorate eggs and have another hunt at Grandma's house on Sunday.




Sorry Silas, no candy for you this year... Mommy has eaten enough for the both of us (thanks to my insatiable hunger!!)


Because of Micah's perpetual boredom and some really nice sunny weather, I finally ventured out to the park with all three kids yesterday. I've been putting it off, but it really was quite easy. In fact, it's probably easier now than it will be in a few months when Silas won't sleep just anywhere.

So, once he was fed, we headed down to Delair park. Silas slept the entire time...


Keziah's hair is finally getting longer. I'm not sure how long to let it get before I trim it... I think I'll wait a little bit longer.


Checking on her baby brother.


I used to convert my single stroller into a double, and now I've figured out that I can convert my double stroller into a triple! That is, as long as everyone is getting along and doesn't mind being a little squished...


Well, I'd better stop there - considering it's taken me 3 days to finally finish this post!

Lunch at the Lake

Erik's been working with a friend at Cultus Lake doing a cabin renovation. On Wednesday us wives drove out with our kids so we could all have lunch together. Unfortunately the beautiful weather from earlier in the week was over and it was overcast and chilly, but the kids still had fun!

Rocks in his crocs.



A tickling feather.



Here are the kids with their new triplet friends. They all got to go on a boat ride after we ate lunch.


This picture is so cute - too bad the camera strap got in the way...


We're ready! Let's get going!!

Photo Shoot

Today I finally had the chance to get some good shots of Silas for his baby announcements. Since my sister Erin is too far away to take the actual pictures (check out her work on her photo blog), I figured the next best thing was to take my own and get her to format a birth announcement for me. Here are a few of my favourites...

Silas' Birth Story

It's hard to believe that Silas is only 5 days old and that one week ago I was still pregnant and wondering when the little dude was going to make an appearance!

The 41st week of my pregnancy was a LO-O-ONG week; false labour, kids with colds & fevers, Keziah's trip to the ER with croup and Erik's ongoing sickness. My mom arrived in the midst of it all and I felt caught between wanting the baby out and wanting us all to just feel better first! By Thursday the kids were incredibly whiny, I was starting to feel sick myself and Erik was feeling discouraged by the fact that he hadn't been able to work all week due to his sickness. On Friday my head cold was as its peak. My braxton hicks came steadily all day and were really strong - not painful like "real" contractions but lots of tightness and pressure in my belly. I felt like I had been in this pre-labour phase for days and even weeks!

By that point I had pretty much given up on going into labour on my own and had come to terms with the idea of being induced. My doctor had put me on the induction schedule for Saturday morning, so we expected to have a baby by the end of the weekend. But, on Friday my mom still prayed that my water would just break so that I wouldn't have to be induced!

I woke up at 2 am on Saturday morning with a contraction that actually felt a little like "real" labour. The next couple of hours were full of restless sleep. Between my mildly painful contractions and my incredibly stuffy nose (which caused me to snore and wake myself up!) I couldn't really sleep. At 4 am I decided to turn on the bathroom fan in an attempt to drown out my own snoring :) and as I rolled out of bed there was a small gush of fluid. It was the same sensation that I'd had when my water "sprung a leak" with Micah so I was feeling hopeful that it was the same thing. I decided to wait it out a bit and let Erik sleep. By 5 am I was still feeling "leaky" and my contractions were getting a bit stronger so I had a shower, woke Erik up and called the hospital. Then we told my mom that we were going in and she was pretty excited!

We got to the hospital at around 6 am where they confirmed that I was leaking amniotic fluid. They monitored me for awhile and then decided to send me home since my contractions were still pretty mild and I was only 2 cm dilated. I didn't expect they would send me home, but I figured labour could still take awhile since my water hadn't completely broken, so we complied :) We got home shortly after 7 and found Micah watching Bambi and Keziah sleeping on the couch (she had heard us leave at 5:30 and decided it was time to get up only to fall asleep on the couch again shortly after!). It was kind of fun to hang out a bit with them and explain to Micah what was happening. My mom was also excited to get in a little bit on the labour process :) We were home about an hour and a half and my contractions were coming every 3-5 minutes and I had to start concentrating through them. So, Erik and my mom decided that I should head back in.


We went back to triage and back on the monitor. At around 9:45 my doctor came in to check me. I had dilated to 4 cm and he could feel a bulging bag of water. He could tell that baby's head was turned a little bit, so he tried to turn it and with that there was a BIG gush of fluid. From that point I knew that things would go quickly! Unfortunately there was quite a bit of meconium in the fluid which meant we had to keep a closer eye on baby during the labour. The nurse brought me to my (huge) hospital room. After delivering 2 babies in the old run-down MSA hospital, the new hospital felt like luxury!!

Contractions got increasingly stronger and I held onto the railing for dear life every time I felt one coming on (see above picture of me between contractions!) and I started thinking about pain medication. I should've known that I was in transition at this point, and sure enough when they checked me I was at 7 cm. Within a few minutes I was feeling the urge to push. This was the first delivery where I didn't have any IV or pain meds of any kind and I admit that it was the most painful pushing experience of the 3. I felt like I didn't get a break between contractions and I was SO ready to get that baby out! I was vaguely aware that baby's heartrate was going down towards the end and that they had called in the pediatrician to check him over as soon as he was born.

At 10:51 am, he was finally out and the pain was gone, but replaced with a few scary moments while we waited for him to cry. Finally we heard his gusty, gurgly cry and he was whisked over to the pediatrician for suction and oxygen. And even though we hadn't known his gender, I wasn't one bit surprised that he was a boy!


My doctor guessed his weight before they put him on the scale and got it right on! This is our biggest baby yet...


This was the first time I wasn't able to hold baby right after delivery, and he was quite worked up by the time I got my hands on him.


We named him Silas Paul. Silas was a name we had picked out for a boy when I was pregnant with Keziah, and even though we waivered on it quite a bit during this pregnancy, we always seemed to come back to it. It's continuing to grow on us as we get to know the little guy. We chose Paul because it was his Uncle Nathan's middle name.

It was nice to deliver so early in the day. I had a chance to breastfeed and shower and get my room cleaned before family started to arrive. Erik's family came around 2 pm and my mom came with the kids a little bit later after Keziah's nap. Micah and Keziah have both been thoroughly infatuated with Silas from their first meeting:


I could've gone home on Sunday already, but my doctor and I decided that I would stay until Monday. The nurses understood why when I told them I had 2 preschoolers waiting for me at home :)








I love wrinkly little newborn heads :)


Silas came out with LONG finger nails and proceeded to scratch up his face over the next couple of days...


Erik and I agree that Silas looks a bit more like Keziah as a newborn, but I definitely see resemblances to both kids. When I look at his face I feel like it's familiar to me; like I already know him. He definitely looks like he's part of the family!


Erik stayed over with me both nights. This hospital experience was much more comfortable and quiet all around!


Here is Silas ready to head home on Monday morning, looking SO tiny in his car seat. This was the same outfit that Micah wore when he came home from the hospital.


Today is my first day without Mom or Erik around and things are going pretty well - they must be or I wouldn't have time to blog! Right now Keziah and Silas are napping and Micah is watching some TV. Nights are going fairly decent. We had one really bad night when we first came home from the hospital, but the last 2 nights have been quite manageable and I'm feeling rested enough today to skip my afternoon nap :)

I have many more pictures on my camera that I've taken since we've been home so I'll try to post those in the next few days...

Silas Paul

Here's a peek at the newest member of our family...

Our computer's being giving us some trouble this week (talk about bad timing!) but hopefully I'll be able to post more pictures and Silas' full birth story soon!

it's a boy!

Silas Paul was born at 10:51 am, 8 lbs 14 oz, 23 in. Mom and baby are doing well!

Ruptured

I woke up at 2 am with mild contractions and a really stuffy nose. Between my contractions and my snoring, I kept waking myself up! At 4 am I decided to turn on the bathroom fan to drown myself out :) and as I rolled over I felt a little gush. My contractions started getting a bit more painful after that and we decided to head into the hospital at 5:30. I wasn't convinced my water had broken but a quick swab test confirmed that indeed it did. My contractions were (and are) getting more painful, but I was still barely dilated so they sent me home until things get a bit more intense. Either way, we'll have a baby sometime today or early tomorrow!

I am feeling quite congested with this head cold and Erik is still not feeling 100%, so pray that we would have health and strength for this day!

Update

We had a bit of a scary night on Monday. Keziah had developed a barking-type cough during the day and at around midnight I woke up to the sound of her coughing and trying to cry out. When I went in she was burning with a fever and struggling to breathe through the coughing. She finally threw up which seemed to help a bit, but she was so listless and her cry was so pitiful. Erik wasn't feeling totally well himself, but he quickly packed up her up and took her into emerg. I stayed at home and tried to sleep - which wasn't happening. Not only was I worried about Keziah, but I was feeling some contractions and praying that I wouldn't go into labour! At the hospital they took Keziah in right away when they discovered that her fever was in the danger zone. It turns out that she had croup so they had to give her a steroid shot as well as a steroid nebulizer mask. They couldn't convince her to take any tylenol orally so they had to give her a suppository. Erik said she cried and cried throughout the whole ordeal, with her most common phrase being, "I wanna go in my van!!" After it was all over they gave her stickers and a purple popsicle and I think she finally cheered up. She still isn't totally herself but the cough seems to be under control.

With everyone around me being so sick - including Erik - I have been caught between wanting this baby OUT and wanting to wait until we're all healthy and well-rested before entering the ordeal of labour. There's something reassuring about knowing that baby Toews is nicely incubated from all these outside germs!

I went to see my doctor again this morning and discovered that I've made a tiny bit of progress. I'm now 1-2 cm dilated, 30% effaced and baby has dropped to -3 station. It's nothing too significant but at least all that "false" labour over the weekend wasn't in vain :) I had another membrane sweep so we'll see what happens. We talked about induction and I feel reassured to have an end in sight. As much as I've resisted induction, there's something nice about the thought of entering the labour experience after a full night's sleep!

This morning I woke up with a sore throat and some sinus congestion but I'm hoping to fight off this cold before the baby comes! At least I'm hoping it won't escalate to the fevers that Erik has been dealing with. So, I will keep you all posted...

(sigh.)

2 days past the due date. Everyone here is sick. Except me. Micah started showing signs of sickness on Friday with the start of a cold and fevers. On Saturday morning he woke up with his lips full of cold sores (not sure if it's related, maybe just a result of his lowered immune system?) and remained feverish throughout the day. Then last night Erik woke up with fevers and chills and Keziah woke up this morning with a deep cough. It's probably a good thing that we're not introducing a newborn to this house-full of germs right now. If you think of us, please pray that everyone would recover quickly (especially Erik as I'm going to need him when the time comes!) and please pray that I can steer clear of all of this. I really can't imagine going through labour on top of being sick!

Speaking of impending labour, this weekend has been a cycle of hope and disappointment. On Friday Erik stayed home from work since I had woken up with some mild contractions and knew I was going to get my membranes sweeped that morning. Later that afternoon (after much internal debate) I decided to take a dose of castor oil. I figured that if it made me sick, then at least I had Erik around to help. I felt fine for an hour and a half, then threw up suddenly (and violently) and then felt pretty much fine all day. I had lots of braxton hicks all that day and the next and some other signs of labour but I figured it was as a result of the internal exam and tried not to get my hopes up (since Erik was getting his hopes up enough for the both of us!) Then I woke up at about 2 am on Sunday morning with some mildly painful contractions that were coming every 4 minutes and felt like they were getting stronger. I didn't want them to stop so I got up and walked around and timed them for awhile. I was SO certain that labour was starting since these contractions felt different than the braxton hicks. I even emailed my mom at about 5 am to let her know what was happening. Shortly after, exhaustion finally kicked in and I decided to try to sleep. The contractions kept waking me up for about an hour and then next thing I knew it was 8:30 and the "labour" had totally fizzled out. Darn it.

Anyway, that's the summary of our weekend. Now Erik is planning to take the day off to recover - which is too bad since he'll have to take more time off when the baby comes and we can't really afford that right now! At least my mom will be here soon (tomorrow). I'm looking forward to having her here. And I keep reminding myself that the most I can be pregnant at this point is another week since it sounds like my doctor will induce me by next Monday at the latest.

Thanks for all your thoughts and prayers - I will keep you all posted!!

Humpy Dumpy

Keziah breaks into a rousing rendition of this song several times a day. Be sure to watch right to the end to see some of her best work :)

Doctor Visit

Tomorrow is my due date. I went to see my doctor today hoping for some good news. Unfortunately baby is still high (-4 station), my cervix is only 20% effaced and 1 cm dilated. A little disappointing since I've been feeling cramps, contractions and pressure for many days already. My doctor said my cervix was soft, though, and he was still able to do the membrane sweep. So, I'm left feeling more crampy but not necessarily optimistic. He was already talking about induction at about 41 weeks. I really wanted to avoid that, but at the same time I'm glad he's willing to induce after only a week since that will still give my mom some time to be here after baby comes.

I also know that all this dilation/effacement talk doesn't necessarily mean anything. Here's hoping that baby will decide to surprise us in the next few days!

Distractions

I remember writing a similar post with this same title back in November 2006 when I was waiting for (the very tardy) Keziah to arrive. But, distractions are what are going to keep me sane in these next days before baby comes. My mind is already consumed with thoughts - analyzing each cramp and contraction or thinking that maybe I can force my water to break by sheer will!


At the beginning of last week I wrote myself a LONG list of things that could keep me busy while I wait for this little one. We have also been spending lots of time with friends and family which has been helpful.

Playdate at Kelly's house last week:


At least Ezra was willing to look for the camera!


The kids got to go swimming in Abbie's pool again. They are getting quite brave in the water (as long as their water wings are on!)


The kids love hanging out in the playpen...


Keziah's hair is doing some funky things these days!


I alternate between feeling patient and feeling anxious for this baby to arrive. Mostly anxious :P Especially as I'm feeling more and more uncomfortable. The baby seems to have moved down (which is a good thing!) but I'm feeling more pressure and making (even more) frequent visits to the bathroom!

I'm also really swollen - I have cankles that still reveal the elastic line of my socks long after I've removed them, and hands that are in a constant state of numbness/tingling (and seem to be at their most useless state when I wake up for my frequent middle of the night bathroom trips).

Sigh. I have to remind myself that each passing day brings me closer to the end - and to the reward of a new little babe!

The kids were having some fun with chopsticks and raisins the other day (Keziah likes to experiment with eating with her eyes closed lately too...):


And yet another great shot of Keziah sleeping. I just can't resist pulling out the camera in these situations... :)


Today Erik's mom treated me to a morning without any kids! Sadly it's almost over. Time for me to go grab some lunch before the kids get back...

38 weeks, 3 days and counting

I went to my doctor's appointment today hoping he might check me for dilation, but he didn't think it was necessary yet at this point. It was disappointing since I was really curious to know if I had progressed, and whether he could sweep my membranes to try to get things going. When he mentioned that he hadn't slept since Sunday because of delivering 2 babies in the last 48 hours, I decided not to push it. He probably wouldn't have been too keen on the potential of having another delivery in the very near future. He said he will do a membrane sweep at my next appointment though - which isn't until next Friday, the day before my due date. I'm guessing if it's going to work, the chances are higher of it working then, when things are a little more ready! I'm just praying that I won't make it to 41 weeks!! I really don't want to still be pregnant when my Mom gets here.

One good thing from my appointment was learning that I had lost one pound!! I gain a crazy amount of weight with each pregnancy and so I was pretty pleased to see that the weight gain has finally stalled!

Ready

This was the last week that I had things planned (i.e. babysitting) and now that it's over I am officially ready for this little one to arrive.

Here's me at 38 weeks:


I think the kids are getting excited about the baby too. And I think they understand what's going to happen. I mentioned in a previous post about the birth video that I let the kids watch. They've found several other videos on the same site that they are fascinated by, like how the baby develops inside the womb. A few times a day Keziah will ask me if she can watch "baby comes out" and her latest favourite is "the needle one" where they show a woman getting an epidural. Maybe she will aspire to be in the medical profession someday! It's really funny to me how much she loves watching these little movies, but I think it has actually helped her put 2 and 2 together in terms of what's inside Mommy's tummy and what will soon be coming out to join our family.


I just wish I could give them a specific date for when the baby will get here. How do I explain that it could happen today or it could happen 3 weeks from now?

I managed to get one picture of the kids using their sled last week after the snowfall. We were able to use it a few times before it all melted, and the kids loved it:


Doing some reading on Mom & Dad's bed:


Keziah has been a bit sick this week. She threw up once, but it's mostly been fevers on and off for the last few days. I knew she was sick when she lay in this position for a full hour the other afternoon watching Ellen on TV.


She hasn't been sleeping that great at nights either and has ended up in our bed a few times this week so that we can all get more sleep:


And just some cute pictures of her at Grandma's house yesterday...


I'm going to the doctor every week now and hope to get checked again at my next appointment on Tuesday. I mentioned all the braxton hicks contractions to my doctor and he said that was a good sign and thought another internal exam might even be enough to move things along. Of course I can hope, but I'm not expecting too much to happen after my long drawn-out pregnancy with Keziah. My main desire is for the baby to come either right before or right at the beginning of my mom's visit (she arrives on the 24th). At that point I think I may be desperate enough to try anything - so bring on the castor oil!